WHATEVER PROBLEM YOU HAVE, let it go. Find the power of the expletive. 'F' it!

Don't make a friend of your problem. Don't entertain it. Would you have a miserable house-guest to stay in your home? Your psyche is your inner 'home' and problems are miserable house-guests. Turf them out! Don't entertain worry and problems in the house of your thoughts. It was probably the ego that created the problem anyway. If this guest wants to hang around, tell it politely (or not so politely if you like) to clear off. But don't focus on it; don't fight it. Fighting anything only gives it more power. Carl Jung, the famous Austrian psychologist, said 'What you resist, persists'.

Why do we always feel that we have to fight with our problems? How often do we use the expression 'wrestling with a problem'? Do that and it will hang around. Don't try to root it out. Ignore it! Starve it of attention! If you starve the unwelcome guest, they will soon pack their bags and leave!

Jung's idea that 'what you resist, persists', is based on the idea that whatever you give your attention to, you get more of. Ralph Waldo Trine, in his famous book, In Tune with the Infinite, said something to the effect too, when he said 'the optimist is right and the pessimist is right'. The optimist expects everything to go right and so it does. The pessimist expects everything to go wrong and, sure enough, it does.

This is the Law of the Universe: the Law of Attraction. What we focus on we get more of. Henry Ford said 'Whether you think you can or you think you can't, either way you are right'. Shakespeare said 'There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so'. Jesus put it 'As a man thinks, so he is'. Buddha said 'Energy follows thought'. And the Bhagavad-Gita says 'Man is made by his belief. As he believes, so he is'.

Affirmations? Yes, but with a New Slant.

When I had my ''F' it' insight - my defining moment - I decided to give up all the affirmations. Years of making them had produced a barely perceptible improvement.

But the mind has to have its constant chatter: its inner self talk. It's not possible to shut it up. So, if it has to have all that self-talk, it must be positive. The affirmations I used to make, like 'I am wealthy', would always bring the snide reply from my ego of 'Oh Yeah! What about the bills?' or some such negative response. The affirmation 'I live in an abundant universe' would elicit something like 'Where are the signs of that then?' So, one thought or belief cancelled out the other. So, in my new 'F' word mind-set, where I wasn't as stressed as before, I found a new trick to get one over on the ego. I began to say 'I love wealth' or 'I love the freedom money can buy'. The ego had no answer to that! It couldn't really argue with an established belief and the focus was still on wealth and not the lack of it. It really is amazing that, without changing my diet one little bit, I have lost quite a few pounds in six months just by saying 'I love to be slim'. The focus is then off the weight problem and very much on what I would like instead.

Health problems, thankfully, have never been an issue for me. Somewhere along the way - way back - I unconsciously learned to never give sickness the chance to be a house-guest in the house of my awareness. But if ill health is your problem (and we all have our own issues to work on); instead of saying 'I am healthy', when you know darn well that you are not (thus setting up an impasse or even a conflict in your mind), trick your negative ego by saying 'I love health', 'I love to be healthy', or 'Being healthy is great'. The ego can't really argue with that and the focus is then on health and not on illness.

The problems you encounter mostly in your life may be to do with unsatisfactory relationships, so use the same system, i.e. 'I love to be in a loving relationship.' Whether you are in one or not at the time, you'd like to be, so the focus is on what you want and not on what you don't want. The Law of Attraction will do the rest. The ego won't have a leg to stand on and your Higher Self can get on with manifesting your desire.

Each of us has our own issue, or issues, to work with. It's as if, before we incarnate, we chose a subject from the Cosmic Curriculum. Getting to grips with our particular choice or challenge brings us closer to achieving Mastery, which is why I believe we are here.

Take a Break
Whatever problem you have or think you have, give yourself a break from it for a day or two by saying the 'F' word, Letting go! Surrendering! Not giving the problem the time of day. While you are having time off from the problem, the answer will probably appear or the problem will disappear, especially if you have called in the assistance of your Higher Self. Handing the problem over to the Higher Self creates the miracles. 'Let go and let God', as some say. Einstein got a lot of his best ideas in his sleep; that's when the ego is out of the way and the Higher Self is operating.

Sometimes I ask myself what a wise old sage would do in a particular problem situation. That's really turning it over to The Higher Self, because the Higher Self is the wise old sage. You'll get the answer. Live as if you already have the answer.

Of course, the ego loves the problem. Its total identity is its investment in limitation. The ego, being limited, loves to stay limited; loves to keep us limited, and then it can still be the boss. It is still in control.

So, with regard to the problem... Use the 'F' word and leave it. Embrace the answer. If the answer hasn't come yet, it soon will.

Another trick is to see where you are right now. NOW! Not 'these days', but right now: this minute. Are you alive? (You gotta be if you are reading this!) Is it really so bad? Maybe right at this moment you have everything you need but you are worried that it may all be taken away from you, or that you are not going to have enough for the future. The future hasn't come yet. All we ever have is now. Do we even know there is a future? We believe there is because everybody says so. But the only time we ever can be sure of is NOW. And it is the only time in which we can do anything.

Don't regret the past either. You did the best you could at the time. Everyone does. 'Do they?' I hear you say. Of course they do, if they knew how to do it any differently or better, they would have done so.

Get Out of the Driving Seat
Most of us are addicted to control. Control is the flip-side of fear. Fear is what makes people want to control. If they had no fear, they could let go and let things be. If you have a need to be in constant control, then you need to really apply the ''F' it' principle. That need to control is an addiction.

There are many types of addictions. Some think that the only addictions are to drugs or alcohol. There are many more: work, sport, religion, unhealthy relationships, sex, in fact anything that gives us a 'fix'; that gives us an escape from our emptiness or pain; our need for an identity; our fear of not being or having enough. Addictions hide from us our inability to have a meaningful relationship or to experience intimacy.

Some of the symptoms of addiction are:

1. Obsessive thoughts about the substance or process we are addicted to; i.e. alcohol, food, exercise etc.
2. Tension in the physical body.
3. The ego says that things must be different in order to enjoy life; 'If only I hadn't done that in the past', or 'I wish things were different in the future, then I could enjoy life'.
4. Seeing life as a problem - instead of a game. 'You struggle and then you die', is most people's mantra. What a lousy way to live! See life as a game. Have fun.
5. Competition. Must win or lose instead of just accepting life as it is.
6. Sense of separation, which has, as its symptoms, fear, anger and resentment instead of Joy, Love and Peace.

I once heard a recovering alcoholic say that until she found recovery and her Higher Power; she felt she had a Godshaped hole in her middle.

Jung said 'Addiction is a thirst for spirituality'. Which brings us back to that bit about reconnecting to our Higher Selves!

When operating from the Higher Self, we can be surrounded by drama and still be composed. One then becomes the witness and not the victim. We can sit in the eye of the hurricane, relax and say ''F' it!' Being right there in the midst of what we perceive as disaster, we can buy in to it, feel victimised, cry 'Ain't it awful', 'Why is this happening to me'? or we can look at it objectively, withdraw our attention from it by adopting the ''F' it!' philosophy and just be a witness to it; thus we starve it of energy and life. But, Boy! Doesn't the ego love a bit of drama!

Living in the solution means seeing the positive.

Abraham Lincoln once said that 'most people are as happy as they make their minds up to be'. Happiness is a decision. How we view things is also important. When we stop judging things or events as good or bad - getting out of the 'ain't it awful' frame of mind and seeking the solution - we feel good. And, remember, what we focus on, we get more of.

Give up the worry and angst. Chill out. ''F' it!'

© 2009, Anne Hassett, All Rights Reserved
Excerpted from The Secret Power Of the 'F' Word, by Anne Hassett, © 2009. Reprinted with permission of O Books, Winchester, UK and Washington, USA. Available at all bookstores or online.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Anne Hassett has worked as a Psychic and Spiritual Counsellor for twenty eight years. She has worked all over the world in places as far flung as Australia, New Zealand, Hong Kong, America, Europe and Dubai. Her work has also involved motivational speaking and empowerment workshops which have helped many. She is the author of Reading Your Child’s Hand (Carroll & Brown).