WE'VE
ALL HAD THAT FEELING OF "BEING CONNECTED".
This could be described as "coming from a place of love"
or "being in your power". Perhaps it's when we're
with a significant other, playing with a child, performing at
work, or doing something you're confident at. This isn't necessarily
"romantic in-love"....it's just open, warm and giving
to others. You're confident and centered in yourself. Unconditional
love and acceptance. Isn't this the energy we'd like to live
from all the time?? I know I would. So...
Are you coming from Love?
But then, something happens. Somehow, we're thrown off-center.
Someone rejects, threatens or gets upset with us. We react.
We get insecure. We close ourselves off to others, and shut-down.
Or maybe we start to judge others, or worse yet "make up
stories" about what's going on with another. Perhaps we
sense others are judging us, and then don't feel that we're
enough - or that our contribution is not going to be received.
Maybe we judge or make ourselves wrong. Maybe we become overwhelmed
by others, or uncomfortable with the level of intimacy that
is brewing. Someone wants something, we're not sure we're able
or wanting to give. Maybe we get attached to an outcome, and
then don't believe we can get what we want - or fear we won't
do something perfectly. Lots of things can shut us down.
What takes YOU out of Love?
Physically, that space around our hearts tightens up and if
we're really paying attention we can feel ourselves shutting
down. The energy shifts from our hearts to our protective and
defensive heads - seeking separation.
Coming back to Love...
1. Awareness - This is the first step. Notice...are
you coming from love? Are you open? Are you closed? Is the conversation
in your head about connecting or separation? Is there compassion
or judgment? Is there love or fear? What's going on?
2. Get Curious - What created
the separation or closing down? Are you making up a story about
the person judging you, being a victim, or manipulating you?
Did you get insecure? What's the root cause?
3. What do you want? - Would you rather come
from love, or stay separate and disconnected? Your choice. I
personally believe that it always serves us and others, when
we come from love. But, this is a choice you have to make for
yourself. The desire to "open yourself to love" again
takes willingness first.
4. What are YOU WILLING to do? Key words here
are YOU...because it's not about what someone else needs to
do, to get YOU back to love. It's not their job. It's yours.
Second key word is WILLING. "Willingness" holds a
higher energy vibration, so even the "willingness"
to get back to love allows answers to arise. With intention...results
follow.
Are you WILLING to...???
-
Recognize you're making up a story about another,
and let it go.
-
TRUST yourself - or the other - that you/they
can handle anything...a task, intimacy, confrontation, or
an emotion.
-
KNOW that "all is well". There is
nothing to "protect" yourself from.
-
If someone isn't acknowledging you the way
you'd like, perhaps you can ACKNOWLEDGE YOURSELF - giving
yourself the reassurance and validation. You are your own
most reliable Source.
-
Be willing for something to NOT BE PERFECT.
-
Speak your truth - truth often moves energy,
and allows us to open back up.
-
Apologize to the other person for shutting
down or making up a story about what they are going through.
-
Let go of the attachment to the outcome. Breathe.
-
Love Yourself - I know this can sound corny,
but this is the MOST IMPORTANT KEY of all. When we are all filled
up with LOVE, we don't need anything from the outside world.
We don't need others to agree with us, believe in us, or change
for us. We are more resourceful, compassionate and understanding.
Our minds become clearer, and we have more to give.
"When we "disconnect" from ourselves, there
is "no one home" for others to connect to."
Ultimately, we are the ONLY Source of LOVE. It's only our perception
that we get it from others. How many times has a loved one told
you, "I LOVE you"... yet, you weren't FEELING it? You
didn't ALLOW yourself to feel it for whatever reason. Give
yourself the gift of LOVE. BE THE SOURCE OF LOVE.
SOULFUL CHALLENGE #1: Notice how open and
"connected" you are throughout the day and week. Are
you coming from love? What takes you out of LOVE? Discovering
these answers for yourself is key.
SOULFUL CHALLENGE #2: When you notice that
you're not coming from love, and have identified what caused
the "disconnect"... ask yourself, "What am I
willing to do?"
And, I'd love to hear your experiences with this potent exercise.
Mary
Allen is in the top 1% of America's professional life
coaches and a leading authority on personal development and human
potential. Mary consistently produces remarkable results, radically
transforming the lives of CEO's entrepreneurs and individuals seeking
accelerated performance, prosperity and peace. Her elite client base
and her stellar reputation have caught the attention of The Oprah
Winfrey Show, The Learning Channel and The Animus Group. She has been
a featured guest on Healthy Lifestyles and on KFI AM's The Rabbi
Mentz Show. Mary is the host of "Conversations with the Masters" and
her interviews with Dr. Wayne Dyer, Debbie Ford, Dr. David Hawkins,
Bijan and Byron Katie have received rave reviews. Mary is regularly
invited to speak and present seminars around the country and is the
author of hundreds of articles for a variety of magazines including
Healing News and MindBodySpirit.com. Mary has an international following
and a massive email database.